Navigating the Holidays With a Baby in the NICU: A Parent’s Guide

The holidays are often pictured as warm, joyful, and predictable, a season filled with traditions, family gatherings, and moments that feel like magic. But when your baby is in the NICU, the holidays can feel very different. You might be spending long hours at the bedside instead of decorating your home, juggling time between children at home and your baby in the hospital, or carrying the weight of emotions you didn’t expect to feel this time of year.

If this is your reality, you are not alone. Many NICU parents describe the holiday season as bittersweet: full of gratitude for the care their baby is receiving, yet shadowed by grief over how different everything looks from what they imagined. This guide is meant to offer reassurance, gentle ideas, and emotional grounding as you navigate the holidays with your baby in the NICU.

You’re Allowed to Feel Everything

Having a baby in the NICU during the holidays brings a mix of emotions: joy, fear, sadness, hope, disappointment, longing, even guilt. All of these are normal. NICU life has a way of reshaping what matters, and if your heart feels pulled in many directions right now, that’s a sign of your love, not a sign that you’re doing anything wrong.

Common feelings NICU parents report during the holidays include:

• Missing family traditions

• Feeling guilty for not being home with other children

• Worrying about your baby’s health and future

• Feeling disconnected from the usual holiday cheer

• Longing for “normal”

• Gratitude mixed with grief

Give yourself permission to feel all of it. Emotions don’t take away from the strength you are showing each day. You’re navigating one of the hardest seasons a parent can face.

Create New Traditions That Fit This Moment

Your holiday may not look like what you planned, but that doesn’t mean it can’t hold meaning. Small, gentle traditions can help you feel connected to your baby and to the season without adding pressure.

Here are simple, NICU-friendly ideas:

1. A Holiday Photo or Keepsake

Ask your NICU team if you can take a holiday photo or dress your baby in a simple, safe NICU-approved outfit. Many hospitals have a visit from Mr. & Mrs Clause and taking pictures with Santa for the first time can be very meaningful. No going to the mall for long lines. Tiny hats, holiday swaddles, or milestone cards can create meaningful memories. (I usually have some free downloadable milestone cards on the homepage)

2. A Family Letter or Memory Page

Write a short letter to your baby about this season, even if they’re too little to understand it yet. Many parents place it in a journal or memory book to look back on later. I personally love this and still reread cards and letters by father wrote to me in his lifetime.

3. Gentle Sensory Moments

Soft holiday music, a quiet moment at the bedside, or dimmed twinkle lights (if permitted in the unit) can create a sense of peace without over-stimulation.

4. A Tradition for Siblings

Siblings may feel the shift in routines deeply.
Consider:

• Making an ornament with their baby sibling’s name

• Drawing a picture to hang near the NICU isolette

• Doing one small tradition at home that stays consistent

Balancing Time Between the NICU and Home

This is one of the hardest parts of the NICU journey, especially during the holidays. Parents often feel like their heart is in two places at once.

A few reminders to help steady this balance:

• There is no “perfect” way to spend your time.

• Being home with your other children matters.

• Being at the NICU matters.

• Rest matters.

• You do not have to be everywhere at the same time.

Talk with your care team about the best times to visit, particularly if you want to participate in cares or specific feeding times. Find out the list of holiday activities at hospital and in the NICU. May times there are holiday related activities a sibling can participate in. Children’s hospitals, in particular, know the stress parents go through year round and especially during the holidays. There are sometimes activity centers or crafts sponsored by Child Life that allow you to step away from the NICU bedside for a moment to participate in a holiday activity with your other child, while not leaving the hospital. Create memories where you are together. Allow yourself flexibility. Some families choose dedicated “NICU time” and “home time,” while others check in more fluidly depending on needs.

Whatever rhythm you choose, it is the right one for your family.